The aim here is to find amusing phrases that can be reused if necessary for a birthday party or with friends.
Funny Unicorn Quotes
"Me ? Crazy ? I should get off that unicorn and slap you !
"When I look in the mirror, I see a unicorn, a unicorn that rocks !"
"Someone told me to grow up yesterday. I immediately forbade that person to ride my unicorn !"
"A friend told me I'm delirious. I almost fell off my unicorn."
"I wish I was a unicorn so I could stab idiots with my head !"
"Always be yourself. Unless you can be a unicorn, then always be a unicorn !"
"Rhinoceroses are just big unicorns ! If we gave them the time and attention they deserve, and a diet, they would show their graceful ways."
"Unicorns are real ! They're just fat and grey and we call them rhinos."
"Stay calm and ride a unicorn."
"Everything is better with a unicorn."
"Being a person becomes too complicated. It's time to be a unicorn."
"Women don't fart. But they make tiny puffs of glitter that look like unicorns laughing and smell like rainbows."
"It will be a kind of day in the rainbow and unicorns."
"The best part of my day is when my pills kick in ! I love unicorns !"
"You may have stopped believing in unicorns, but they never stopped believing in you."
"Unicorns can't fly. I can't fly. So I am a unicorn."
"This is not a unicorn. It is a horse with a sword on his head that protects my hopes and dreams."
"At least the unicorns love me."
"Only two percent of the world has red hair. So I'm fundamentally a royal unicorn !"
"May your day be more beautiful than a unicorn farting rainbows."
"Unicorns are great. I am great, so I am a unicorn."
"Missing unicorn : If you find it, you're probably high !"
Literary quotations from the magic white animal
"Now I will believe that there are unicorns."
William Shakespeare ; The Storm
"Dreams are the playground of unicorns."
"The best use of a unicorn's horn is to trim it."
Benevolent Unicorn, Magic the Gathering Card
"God himself must be translated, if there is no unicorn in the world."
"Unicorns don't care if you believe in them any more than you love them if they believe in you."
Royal Unicorn, Magic the Gathering Card
"Unicorn hunting. The evaluation of our souls."
"All the beasts obeyed Noah when he admitted them into the ark. All except the Unicorn. Sure of his own abilities, he boasted "I will swim."
"The unicorn, the beautiful white horse with the magic healing horn."
"A wise man never plays leapfrog with a unicorn."
"Unicorn. Old French, unicorne. Latin, unicornis. Literally one horn : unused, one and horn, one horn. A fabulous animal resembling a horse with a horn."
Peter S. Beagle ; The last unicorn
"Then what's the use of magic ?"
"What use is sorcery if it can't save a unicorn ?"
Peter S. Beagle ; The Last Unicorn
"There are unicorns everywhere, even in Woodmont. You know it, I know it, maybe nobody else knows it. You look for them, you listen to the music, you listen to Shei'rah. You have time."
Peter S. Beagle; The Unicorn Sonata
"Well, now that we have seen each other," said the unicorn, "if you will believe in me, I will believe in you."
Lewis Carroll ; Through the Looking Glass
"Every month the unicorns would gather at dusk to dance in a circle under the dark full moon. They were the only race they knew that did it. For when Alma created the world, she first shaped all the other creatures, in earth, wind, water and air, and then invited them to dance. But the pots turned away from her, the gryphons flew to find mountains in which they could nest, and the red dragons sank deep into the Smoking Hills, and the vyverns laughed.
Thus, Alma created unicorns in her own form : full-bodied and long for fast running, wildhearted and warm-blooded to make brave warriors out of them. Then she pulled some of her shiny objects from the cycling moon to shape their hooves and horns into dancers. Thus, Alma's newest and most beloved child is also called the Children of the Moon and dances every month dancing the dance under the rising, rounded moon. "
Meredith Ann Pierce ; Birth of the Fire Carrier
"Unicorns," she murmured. Rahela nodded her head. "The most beautiful of all the mother's children."
Jennifer Roberson ; The Summer King
"...and from the heart of the flower appeared a unicorn..."
"I can play it again ; for he likes to hear
Unicorns can be betrayed by trees,
And bears with glasses, elephants with holes,
Hard working lions and flattering men".
William Shakespeare ; Julius Caesar
"The unicorn," she said, "was a wonderful beast, shining with honour, wisdom and strength. Just to see it strengthen the soul. "
Megan Lindholm ; The Unicorn in the Labyrinth
"In the night, the night spent in the street. She felt the terror, the magic and the impossibility to be there or to go there.
"What do you want ? What do you want ?"
But the unicorn only passed through the village like the wind, silent, without music."
Tanith Lee ; Black Unicorn
"There was no violence, no speed. She moved to the rhythm of an ancient dance, putting all the rituals of the world to shame.
Tanith Lee ; Black Unicorn
It was white like I remember the best vanilla ice cream, but thinner and smoother. Sometimes the sun would reach him perfectly and bright rainbow crescents would spread out like a light with the help of a fine rain of water. The hooves were made of mirror, platinum or silver, I didn't know that. A distant beacon of a lonely night, the spiral horn rose from the noble head : milky white, warm and welcoming. Eyes full of life and intelligence. Eyes into which I could fall. The lover's eyes. As he moved, the mane shone on his muscular neck like a road on a hot day. "
Steven R. Boyett ; Ariel
"I left the door open halfway and got dressed, trying to imagine the reaction of our neighbour who had a unicorn bell at the door and wanted to know where a good shopping mall was."
Steven R. Boyett ; Ariel
"You've been trying to read fantasy books all your life - take a unicorn walk on the bench of your bus on a hot day, with everything you ever wanted tied up in a package - and see if you'd do almost nothing to get it."
Steven R. Boyett ; Ariel
"I thought unicorns were more soft."
'See clear ! Don't let the glamour get you! See what is before your eyes ! It's a hell of a horse with a horn on the end ! ", said Granny."
Terry Pratchett ; Lords and Ladies
"When God created the earth, he created a river flowing from the garden of Eden. Then God told Adam to name the animals. And the first animal he named was the unicorn. When the Lord heard Adam's name, he bent down and touched the tip of the horn that came out of the animal's forehead. From that moment on, the unicorn was raised above the other beasts."
Nancy Hathaway ; The Unicorn
"The unicorn was white, with silver hooves and a graceful pearl horn. The most glorious thing about him was his eye. The eyes, surrounded by this sad and beautiful darkness, were so sad, lonely, sweet and nobly tragic, that they killed all other emotions except love."
T. H. White
"It was a thick face, with crests carved into the darkest walnut instead of brilliant reflections, and with strange, icy eyes that suddenly reminded him that unicorns were not Tame. Wild magic, always free, of what man might want or wish."
Doranna Durgin ; Touched by magic
"Touched ?! A deadly hand on a unicorn !?"
From the movie "Legend"
"Nothing is more magical.
As long as they wander the Earth, evil cannot harm the pure of heart."
From the film "Legend"
"Once upon a time, long ago, before time reigned, the world was plunged into darkness.
Then came the splendour of light, bringing life and love into the universe, and the Lord of Darkness withdrew into the depths of the Earth's shadow, preparing for his return to power, banishing light forever.
The harmony of the universe depends on a balance in the universe. From the struggle to maintain this balance is born the birth of Legends. ”
From the film "Legend"
"The people who see them share some of the characteristics of the unicorn : they are lonely with virtuous hearts."
By Ally McBeal
"The unicorn is not beautiful because of its horn, its grace, its pride and its silent wisdom ; but because of what it stands for".
"I will capture sweet zebras / for your couriers and fill the stable with all kinds of unicorns."
- Song of love by night and by day
"Canst thou, O death, not come as a unicorn ?"
"If the unicorn lives among the eternal snows on the equator, then it is obvious that the world should know so little about him."
"They have a horn on their forehead which measures about a foot and a half."
Ctesias ; Indica, 416B.C.
"To this day, it is said, malevolent animals poison this water after sunset, so that no one can drink it. But early in the morning, as soon as the sun rises, a unicorn comes out of the ocean and plunges its horn into the water to hunt the venom out of it so that other animals can drink it during the day. This is how I describe it. I saw it with my own eyes."
Johannes van Hesse of Utrecht ; 1389
"Around noon we saw an animal watching us from a barren mountain of red and black rocks. Our guide said that the animal must be a unicorn and pointed out the unique horn protruding from its forehead. With great caution we looked back at this very noble creature, regretting that it was not more difficult for us to examine it even more carefully".
Brother Faber ; 1438
"Then God told Adam to name the animals. All the creatures gathered around. And the first animal he named was the unicorn."
From the Hokham Bible
"The last unicorn wasn't really the last. And maybe she still isn't."
"Wherever they have come and wherever they have gone, unicorns live in the heart of the true believer. Which means as long as we can dream, there will be unicorns."
"The unicorn lived in a lilac wood and she lived alone. She was very old, even if she did not know it, and she was no longer the careless colour of sea foam, but rather the colour of the snow that fell on a moonlit night. But her eyes were always clear and under stress, and she was always moving like a shadow on the sea. She looked nothing like a horned horse, for unicorns are often depicted, they are smaller and more stubborn, and possess that oldest and craziest grace that horses have ever had, that the deer has only in a shy and slender imitation and dancing mocking goats . Its neck was long and thin, making its head smaller than it was, and the mane which fell almost down the middle of its back was soft as down and as fine as cirrus. She had pointed ears and slender legs, with white feathers at her ankles; and the long horn above her eyes shone and trembled with its own shell light, even in the deepest of the night. She had slain dragons with her and healed a king whose poisonous wound would not close. She had also spilled chestnuts ripe for cubs."
Peter S. Beagle - The Last Unicorn
"After all, you have to believe in magic - no matter how small - for a world to survive."
Terry Brooks - The Black Unicorn
"Other fabulous creatures are clearly inventions, existing only in a mythical landscape of our own collective creation. But the Unicorn seems to us to be more than imagination. It seems possible, even probable - a creature so probable that it should exist."
"The question of historicity and actuality with regard to gods and unicorns is a relatively insignificant matter which can be left to antique dealers and biologists, for the god and the unicorn had a more important job to do than what a mere existence in the flesh could explain would provide a basis for. "
Odell Shepard, The Knowledge of the Unicorn